Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Sheep just follow...

I'm amazed at how little research people do on things that effect their health and body. I've always been cautious of vaccines, but it seems now that this pandemic of paranoia has crept into the homes of millions and people are just accepting things to be true.

First let me tell you of my experience. After Emma had gotten any shot she became very different within 24 hours and stayed like that for up to two weeks. She would not interact the same, she wanted to sleep instead of play, she had a hard time focusing. I realized this was going on, but I trusted my Dr. when she told me if had to be from a different source. When it came up on her 6 month shot, I had extreme reservations. I wanted to tell the Dr. we are stopping these vaccines, but I chickened out against my gut feeling. Emma got her shots and within a few hours started having involuntary shaking episodes, it scared her and she would scream and try and tense her body while they were going on. There was nothing I could do to comfort her during these 'spells'. They continued for hours. I called the Dr. and she said it was because the area was sensitive and it tensed up. I told her it wasn't just the area, she looks as though she is having a seizure. She asked if she had a temp, and I told her she had it was 99.9 degrees... a low grade fever, but a fever none the less. We went to bed, and I had Emma sleep in my bed with me so I could keep an eye on her. She continued these episodes during the night, right out of a dead sleep. She'd wake up thrashing and screaming. In the middle of the night she started vomiting like I have never seen anyone vomit before. That stage quickly passed. She had a fever, so I gave her tylenol, and a cold cloth, and that brought it down some. When I tucked her back in bed with me I noticed her skin had bumps. She has a bit of eczema, so I thought that's all it was. A couple of hours when she had another spell, I turned on the light and she was completely broken out in hives. I was furious at this point. She was fine, happy and healthy until she got her shot and now her body was going CRAZY! I called my Dr. and demanded that she take a look at her. When we went she told me that Emma must have a little virus that is not due to the vaccine, and she would be fine. I couldn't believe this. I know my child, I know this was NOT normal. I've seen Emma sick before, and this was not sick.. this was a reaction to something, and the only thing that had been added to her environment was the vaccine. I was mad at myself because I should have listened to my gut in the first place. But I will never let her have another shot, and that experience has given me the boldness to stand up for my daughter.

Since then I look into ingredients in vaccines, and although I am blown away by some, most are the same preservatives and additives in our everyday food and drinks. One is not, and it is a toxin and is not found in our bodies, in fact our bodies are not suppose to have any traces of this in our system at any time. We can't break it down, and it causes neurological damage and many diseases. It's called Thimerosal- it is 50% mercury (ethyimercury). Russian biochemists did a study on this and found that those injected with thimerosal developed brain damage years later, they also found that it had caused tubular necrosis and nervous system injury, including obtundation, coma, and death. As a result of this study Russia has banned this from vaccines. Since then so has Austria, Japan, Great Britain, and all of the Scandinavian countries. So, what is it doing in our vaccines? We know that scientists know this toxin is very dangerous we also know it acts as one of the best preservatives because it kills fungi, bacteria, growing cells, etc. However, as regulated as we think our health system might be concerning vaccinations, if big pharma and all these other pharmaceutical companies are aware of the dangers of these ingredients-just because I said there are others that are found in our daily life does not mean that they are safe, most preservatives cause cancer- yet they still put these out there as being safe, why won't they stand behind their product. Most people think they do because the media says it's ok, or a Dr. told them it was fine........ yet laws have been passed that if something happens to a person(s) they cannot be held responsible for the outcome. That means it is a 'Take at your own risk' deal! Now if something is 'take at your own risk' you'd better be sure I'm going to look into it. Also, if it were safe why are the Dr.'s who have studied out the ingredients refusing to take the shot? Some Dr.'s are just like us, and believe what they are told or what is written in a text book or an article on a subject, however, if you look into metals, minerals, toxins, etc for yourself, there is no mistaking.

Still they won't tell you that the flu viruses (which the H1N1 is a live virus) are grown in eggs. So people with egg allergies or any shell allergy should not be getting this shot. There is no other shot for these people at the moment, and there is no warning for the general population to know this.

I was in Shoppers Drug Store yesterday to pick up some vitamin D (which is the most vital 'hormone'- no it is not actually a vitamin- in keeping your immune system and the organs strong enough to fight off viruses, and it works more aggressively than a vaccine. Look it up, it has been studied and proven.) and a woman was in line in front of me and she was sneezing and talking about how she had just got the H1N1 shot a few days ago and they told her she would probably have a few symptoms as her body fought it off. Her nose was running and she said she had a bit of a fever, but other than that------- I was like 'OTHER THAN THAT?' A dead virus does not mutate..... you don't get symptoms from a dead virus, it doesn't actually evolve into anything. Her body HAS H1N1 going through it's veins. And here she is sneezing this thing right into the air. A living virus will mutate until it is killed.. that means grow in lay terms.... so if someone's immune system isn't strong enough to fight it off before they have symptoms... they become contagious. So not only is this vaccine dangerous to our own bodies.... it is dangerous to those around us if we become symptomatic.

Anyways- I urge you to not only look into vaccines because of the H1N1 virus that's going around now.... but because you can see for yourself there is more harmful ingredients to your body than what the flu could ever do. And do the same for the foods you eat, read labels. It's law that they have to put ingredients on them so you know.. some of the ingredients will shake you. Take your health into your hands- no one is going to take better care of your body than YOU!

Not all vaccines are made the same, and some have different preservatives in them. But you won't know what they are until you look them up. The long medical terms may intimidate you, but you can break them down so that you understand more of what they are and what their side effects are.

Don't just be a sheep who follows everyone else..... do your homework. Especially if you have children in your family to protect as well.

I realize not everyone will agree with me, that's fine, although I'm not sure how anyone can side with poison, but to each their own! :)

Monday, October 26, 2009

Crossroads

There is no question that we are in a crossroad in our life. Sometimes it's hard to trust that God has a plan. We know that it is true, but some days it feels so far away. I'm all about waiting for things to happen in the right time, however, I sense that the time I have been waiting for is about to start.

I'm excited, because there is so much unknown. I'm just following a voice in my heart and I feel completely blind, but I trust it and there is peace!

Nick quit his second job, and I have felt a huge burden leave us. The extra money was good, but the toll is was taking in our household was not healthy for any of us. The moment he quit, my irritation, frustration and anxiety immediately lifted. He seemed lighter and happier, and I knew it was the right thing! So onward and upward!

I haven't heard back from that job yet- I've called and left a message. However my prayer is 'Lord if a door should open, let it be from you, if it is not, keep it closed.' and I trust that He will do just that!

I know something is right around the corner, I can feel it, and it's good. I just need to keep the faith and believe that God is in control no matter what it is. I feel like I am trying to plan my life myself, and just when I think I have it under control God moves me in the opposite direction. I'm willing to go, but it just shows me how much He cares for me, because His way has proven to be far better than mine.

In the meantime, I think I may write a book. I love writting, but I feel like I have gone through so much that can be used as encouragement instead of chains in my life. If I can cry with someone and truly understand, hug someone and really mean it with my soul, laugh with someone and feel their joy, greive with someone like it is my own loss.. I have no doubt that, that sensitivity was placed within me from God... and He doesn't give out gifts for them not to be used. So I may go with that and just write a book on life that's extremely raw and real. I think I will! If not for anyone else, then as an outlet to finally let go of the things that have hurt me and have caused me to withdrawl, which has only left me robbed.

So much to think about. I'm ready, I'm willing, and I am able through Christ!

Be blessed and encouraged!

Friday, October 23, 2009

To work or not to work!

I'm well aware that a stay at home mom is a working mom! It is the most fulfilling job I have ever had in my life, and I have had some amazing jobs:

Gymnastics coach
Artillery Woman in the Armed Forces
Woman's Self Esteem mentor/Children's Anger Management mentor
Office Assistant
Nanny
Cashier
Hotel Reservations Agent/Vacation planner
Script writer/Actress for Racism documentaries for high schools
My self made baby bedding business online
Teachers Assistant for at risk children in a First Nation school
Tourist shop keeper
Lifeguard

....and all of that together never gave me the same satisfaction. However, being a mother doesn't come with a bi-weekly pay check. And I like to earn money, I like to be around people, I LOVE to help people and encourage people. And as all mom's know, it is nice to get a break to do something for ourselves. So in that time I have decided to be productive. Nick is in the works of changing jobs.. we will see how that goes. But I have been unemployed for some time now, and I think it is time I got back out there. Not just for money, but because a mom's life shouldn't just be about her children. I want Emma to see that she can have everything she wants if she goes out and gets it and develops a good balance.

So I applied for a job that is a bit of a stretch for me, but it is something I have wanted to do for some time now, I have just never worked up enough guts to actually apply! Well I went on a spontaneous moment and applied to be a fitness trainer. It is seriously a stretch because I still breastfeed. However I was planning on having Emma weaned pretty soon, so this will give me the motivation to stick to it when I want to give in. She is doing great with eating and drinking tons, gaining weight like a champ.... she nurses for comfort really & I want to teach her I will be there to comfort her no matter what, she doesn't need to nurse for me to come to her attention.

Anyways- I'm not sure if I will get it! I'm pretty sure if she hasn't already hired I am going to be considered. I have never NOT gotten a job I wanted before- not to boast... but people tend to really like me ;) And I like people :) I'm confident, excited, motivated and a hard worker- why wouldn't someone hire me? All jokes aside, I really want this job. Not to mention free gym membership and a chance to meet new people!

I'm excited about this! I am, however, nervous that someone will have to watch Emma for 4 hours of the day when Nick and I (if I get the job) will both be working. But 4 hours a day that Emma is away is not bad compared to other situations. Other than that, she will always be with either Nick or I. She will wake up to both of us, and she will go to bed with both of us. So this is ideal for me.

Lord- let things work out according to your plan! You know the desires of my heart, but I know your plans are better than mine, so go before me, I trust you! Amen!

Be blessed in your own journey through this life! :)

I'm encouraged!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

I'm back!

Wow- if I could get life to slow down a bit I'd have time to keep up on my blog! I feel so blessed in my life right now. No not everything is perfect, but I am tremendously blessed!

My baby girl is a few short weeks shy of turning one! What a little miracle baby she is! After multiple miscarriages and a terrifying pregnancy God has given me my pride and joy, the beat of my heart outside of my body! It's been tiring and hard work, but more rewarding than anything I have ever done! I'll post some recent pictures soon, I am on Nicks laptop and my pictures are uploaded to my laptop, so I'll have to post those later.

Have I ever mentioned how blessed I am to be married to my husband? After being used and abused and feeling worthless and unloved.... God brought my husband into my life and I am forever grateful. Marriage is work, but all I have to do is look past the circumstance and that man who saw beyond my past and loved me back to life is my partner in life! I am so blessed to be married to such a great person!

I just can't stop expressing my gratitude for the grace that has been extended to me!

I lost a dear friend recently from breast cancer. She was faithful to the end and trusted God with her life and now I believe she is well and whole. I admire her a lot, she really encouraged me when I felt bound! Thank you Jesus for sending people like that into my life! She leaves her husband behind, so please pray for him, I can't imagine losing my husband!

Nick has an opportunity to own his own business, his friend has done it before and with great success, it more than triples his income which will give us financial freedom. So we are praying for direction and seeking God.

I'm feeling great these days and am getting more time to myself. I make sure to fit ME time in, it really helps me to keep level headed and not feel overwhelmed. I've picked back up things that I enjoyed before becoming a mother. Tanning, crafts, working out, meeting new people, decorating. It took me a long time to figure out how to have that, maybe I am a little slow... lol... but I've gotten myself into a groove and it is much easier now.

A quick update on Emma (because I am tired and want to go to bed)
-she has 8 teeth now.
-she is walking all over the place more, but when she is tired she will only crawl.
-she likes to slap me in the face- I'm hoping she'll grow out of this, until then she gets corrected.
-she has learned to undress herself... she hates shirts on, she will take them out, and crawl out of her pants if she is hot. I've never seen a baby do that before. lol
-she loves anything music. Playing the piano calms her down, she loves to play the jambe.
-Out of the 5 birthday gifts we got for her, I have already given her 3 because I suck at holding them back! However I have Christmas gifts I have not given her yet, so I am doing better ;)
-she says 'Mum' 'Dada' 'dat' (for 'whats that' and 'I want that'), Nena (for my friend Rena), Nana (for Nanny), a weird grunt sound when she wants me to do something 'again'.. I think she is trying to make the 'G' sound. I think that is it so far.

Alright... I will post more of what has been going on! Have a good night all!!

p.s Lisa I will try and stay more regular just for you!!! However I think you should start a blog so you can express your day to day thoughts and feelings of having a soon to be toddler and being pregnant. :) Just a thought!

Blessings!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

WEIGH IN!

OK- I'll make this short because I am about to house shop for a layout plan for our future home and I am excited about that!

So.... I wanted to lose weight extremely fast after I had Emma... until I read a lot of information on the safety of it, as well as the effects it would have on my plan to breastfeed Emma. It's not as easy as you think it might be to lose weight while breastfeeding, because you need the extra calories to make milk, so you can't just start burning off what you need, so basically, it's the old fashion- eat right, exercise some everyday, and let weight fall off slowly and naturally. Everything said to give yourself 9 months before you do anything rigorous to try and lose weight. So a 9 month up 9 month down deal! I liked that, seemed more realistic to me than trying to fit into my size 3 jeans a month after I just birthed a baby! Not going to happen- and didn't!! ;)

So that's what I did, although some days I got in a kick to try and speed it up, but my milk supply always took a dip, so I was unable to keep that up.

So... that said. These are the numbers:

Goal to gain for pregnancy-25-30lbs
Gained in the 9 months of pregnancy- 30lbs
Goal to lose-50lbs
Lost 9 months after pregnancy- 46lbs

Now I didn't make it to 50lbs.... however, I am extremely thrilled with 46lbs... obviously I have lost all the baby weight, but I like to aim high, and because of that I lost more than baby weight, and that makes me so happy! Not that I am trying to be mega skinny- I know what is healthy for me and I watch out for that.

I'm due to lose more after I am finished breastfeeding- that should take off the extra 4lbs of milk I carry around with me everyday!! LOL And I won't have to eat as many calories to keep my milk healthy. So I really should do another weigh in when I am done nursing.

Anyways, I am more than pleased! :)

Happy skinny girl signing off!!

Blessings!

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Pictures! :)

ALMOST NINE MONTHS OLD!!
She hurt her lip, so she decided to stick it out for a while! lol
Mellowing out- getting close to bedtime!

Just got back from shopping with Daddy!


"I have something to say...."


Daddy and Baby's day at what used to be a mini zoo.... but there were only two goats!
OK, I know I am not in a lot of pictures... but it's because I always take the camera everywhere and love taking pictures. And it might have something to do with not liking the way 'someone' {won't point any elbows} takes pictures. However I am going to work on that! ;)





August Already!

I cannot believe how fast the days are going by! I'm already shopping for fall/winter clothes for Emma. If anyone knows of a good place to buy a cute and warm winter jacket (not snow suit) let me know.

So nothing big and exciting has been going on. We picked out new furniture for our living room and have been finishing up Emma's room. I just have a couple of things left to do before I post pictures! It has turned out great, I am very pleased and Emma loves spending time in there. I like to think it is because of my decorating skills, but I think it has something to do with her large mirror I let her dance and stare at herself into. She LOVES looking at herself. What a girl!!

It's almost time for my weight loss due date! My 9 months up 9 months down loss, I'm pretty excited- nervous- but excited! I'll let you know how much I lost. I gained exactly 30lbs with my pregnancy and I hope to get down 50lbs from that! That's my goal, and it's where my weight would be it's healthiest and leanest, so I'm crossing my fingers!! :)

I can't believe September is next month! That's one month away from my 25Th birthday! I actually can't believe I will be 25 this year. I used to think that was 'all grown up' but I am starting to realize that the feeling I thought hit you one day to make you feel like an adult doesn't come much in a 'feeling' but more in the amount of responsibility and personal growth. Not what I expected, but I did make goals for myself while I was in high school as to what I wanted my life to look like by 25. I wanted to be married and have a child, go to college, buy a car, and buy a house; I have accomplished all of that with the exception of buying a house, although in the next few years we hope to find the perfect house for us!

On kind of a downer note: my little brother has been shaken up lately. He was at the beach last weekend and he watched a man drown right in front of his own son. The people on the beach thought the kid was playing when he yelled that he was trowing. Of course the boy was standing on a rock yelling, so it did not appear that he was in trouble. However, his father had slipped under water while he was swimming out to the little island the boy was at and could not get to the top to signal trouble or get air. When the boy started crying, people knew this was serious, many people in the water and on the beach began to swim out to help this man, but they could not find where he had gone under. Meanwhile, someone was sent down to the large beach to get lifeguards and call 911. The fire department was there in no time and the fire men had stripped down to almost nothing in a flash and had gotten in the water to help. One man felt something rub his foot and when he went under to see what it was, he found the father. He quickly brought him above the water as the lifeguards swam over to place the man on the board to bring him to shore. Once there he was given CPR to no avail- here in NB you are not permitted to declare a death so CPR must be given consistently until a person is brought to the hospital and declared deceased by a MD. With great sadness in my heart while typing this, I have to say, this man did not come back to life. Many people on the beach have never seen anything like this happen before, and my brother, so helpless to do anything, was in shock. While the beach was quiet as people prayed that this man would breath, a woman started screaming at her son (who was swimming over to the island with this man) that it was his fault he died and that the other young boy lost his father, she had said '...you made him swim over there with you, you killed him!' When my brother told me this, I immediately wished I was there. I'm not very violent- but I think I would have punched her in the mouth. A child who can do nothing to save a grown man but watch him die and be ignored when he cries for help should NEVER have to deal with the added guilt he must already feel and have to deal with for the rest of his life! What a stupid mother!
Anyways, this is a sad situation, I feel for this young son who has lost a father, I feel for the boy who was told it was his fault, and for the family that lost a relative. People need to remember- you don't keep your swimming skills if you only swim in the summer, what you were able to swim last year does not dictate what you are able to swim this year unless you have continued to do so year round. And if you decide to swim any distance in which you are unable to stand and have your head above water, make sure you go to a beach with lifeguards. If you do find yourself in a situation where you are in water and are tired- turn on your back and FLOAT and yell for help, or wait until you have gained strength to swim again and kick while on your back in the direction that will get you to safety. {This is the lifeguard in me...} It's better to feel slightly embarrassed than to lose your life!

That's too sad to end on- SO... on a GREAT note! A man got in a car accident the other day while he was having a heart attack over on Paradise Road. His heart stopped completely and his car drove into a tree or telephone pole. When his car hit the tree it caused his body to smash into the steering wheel and the force caused his heart to start back up. What an event, eh? If he wouldn't have been driving in that moment and gotten into an accident, he would not be alive today! Talk about perfect timing. Totally bizarre, but amazing!